Density
by Shacklebolt's Mistress
Summary: An AU story. What would have happened if Sirius had been sorted into Slytherin? This is SLASH. Hope you enjoy it! :P First three chapters up, more soon. R & R please. And don't despair, Words by Fangirls will also be updated soon!
1. Chapter 1

So, we all know that I don't own the characters and I certainly aren't profiting from any of this. It's all J.K's.

…

Density.

Chapter One- The Beginning, again.

He had watched the three friends he had met on the train all get sorted into Gryffindor, and he tried to stop the heavy disappointment rest in his belly as he finally took his turn beneath the ancient, battered hat. A voice filled his head.

"_Well, well, well, I see something in you, mister Black, something that makes a you a little more interesting than those that sat here before you…"_

"_Interesting?" _Sirius wondered.

"_Yes… different. I'm not sure that Slytherin will be the best place for you… I think you could do quite well for yourself somewhere else. Somewhere…"_

"_Different." _Sirius' thoughts finished the sentence for him.

"_You sound just like the others. Do you have a problem with different, boy?"_

"_Mother would kill me…" _He ignored the sting that threatened oncoming tears.

"_Very well, if you must be like them…"_

"SLYTHERIN!"

With that Sirius Black took his place at the Slytherin house table, refusing himself a glance towards the boys who looked on, disappointed, from the far table.

…

Soon Sirius was immersed in school work and the strange and rigid social structure within Slytherin house. His family's name and blood-status afforded him some instant respect despite his age. In later years it would combine with his abilities and quick tongue to put him at the head of the pack; a dangerous place to be when James Potter and his cronies were out to play.

It was sixth year and Sirius was wandering the halls of the castle unable to sleep. "Lookie here… It's a snake come crawling out of its hidey hole." James' voice echoed around Sirius. A shadow to Sirius' left moved, the long-haired boy aimed a nasty curse at it only to discover that it was a decoy. Within seconds Sirius was dangling upside down from the roof, his wand rolling across the floor until it came to rest at the battered left shoe of one Remus Lupin. The friendship they had started on the train had, over the years, become a long-standing feud and Sirius was caught alone.

"Come on James, let him down," Remus picked up the wand, "It's not only unfair, it's not even that much fun. He doesn't want this, I don't want it. It's getting late. You've got better things to do, don't you?" Remus looked at Sirius, offering him an encouraging grin.

Sirius took in the long, thin nose and the deep green eyes of the boy before him, his narrow hips and his neat, yet battered appearance. The thin hands held his wand gently, almost ready to hand it back to him.

"If I wanted help from a filthy mudblood like you I wouldn't deserve to be called a wizard! Now get your disgusting hands off my things or I might have to give you a few more scars to go with the ones you've already got!" Sirius spat.

Remus' eyes hardened and his mouth formed a thin, straight line.

"I tried to help you, you ignorant fucker. Now whatever happens to you is your own bloody fault. Never confuse mercy for weakness, not with what we all know is coming," Suddenly he was nose to nose with Sirius, his cheeks flushed and his eyes steel, "Now and later, when you're out doing that madman's bidding, I want you to remember that you could have done yourself a favour." He threw Sirius' wand at the wall and marched off to the corner. Sirius had forgotten about James until he stepped forward now, grinning like a maniac.

"What do you reckon, Moony? Pride comes before a fall… Rather poetic don't you think."

"Not really, James. Then again, what do I know? I can't think for all the filth in my veins."

…

They had had a rousing meeting, Sirius' head was still reeling from the words the Dark Lord had said, and the open praise he had given Sirius specifically. He and the other boys his age were in the powder room off the main ballroom at Grimmauld place. They were waiting with anticipation to have the Dark Mark bestowed upon them. Behind the nearby wooden door sat the entire assembly of Death Eaters and the Dark Lord himself, they had had a meeting, the Dark Lord giving a speech before sending the boys away while he spoke of things they weren't privy to- not yet. Finally the boys were called one by one, until just Sirius and Snape sat side by side. They remained silent. Sirius had never liked the other boy who seemed to resent Sirius for everything that had ever happened to him. Sirius didn't take it personally, Snape resented everyone. Snape in turn regarded Sirius with a chilly deference. They seemed about equal in almost all magical abilities, except for potions and transfiguration. Snape's abilities with potions were almost unbelievable and Sirius' natural abilities at transfiguration had turned quite a few teacher's heads. Now, it seemed it had also caught the attention of the Dark Lord himself. Snape was called into the next room. Sirius sat back in his chair and looked down at his hands his eyes wandering to his left arm, they ran over the pale, smooth skin of his forearm. There was one blemish, the scar from the night James Potter and the other boy had caught him unawares. The thin line ran from his elbow to his wrist. He wondered if it would be covered by the dark mark. Sirius thought of the green, serious eyes that had regarded him coldly as he lay on the ground when they were done dragging him around the floor of the Forbidden Forest. His arms and hands cut, his back sore and a myriad of unspeakable things in his hair. He also thought about how those eyes had looked when the boy, Remus, had regarded him in an almost friendly way. Sirius ran a finger along the scar, wondering why he would remember that, and why now? He didn't have to wonder long, he was soon called into the next room.

…

The Dark Lord stood at the far end of the room, the death eaters gathered into two sections, leaving a path down the middle. Silver masks glimmered beneath pitch black hoods as Sirius made his way forward. He had memorised the ceremony years ago.

"Who comes to the Dark Lord?" Voldemort demanded.

"It is I, Sirius Black."

"Why does he approach?"

"I wish to show my lord due deference, to engage in the fight for blood purity of the wizarding peoples as a fearless soldier. I wish to offer my sacred magics to this just cause. I wish to become your willing slave and servant to the greatness bigger than myself."

"Are you of pure blood?"

"I am, Lord."

"Are you of rightful mind?"

"I am, Lord."

"Have you bravery?"

"Much, Lord."

"Have you luck?"

"I will not need it, Lord. I have truth and conviction. I am equipped to combat the blood traitors and the impure."

"Kneel before your master."

Sirius went down on bended knee as Voldemort took hold of his left hand.

"This man is pure and brave. He has agreed to join the righteous and we welcome him to the fold. His talents and triumphs given to him by his birth will increase our own. We are glad to have one such as him." Voldemort turned Sirius' hand over, his bony fingers holding Sirius in a vice-like grip. The bone-white wand jabbed into Sirius' arm and he thought that the burning on his arm was creeping into his soul. Just when he thought it could get no worse it was over. He stood before Voldemort and was soon covered in a heavy, black cloak, his vision partially obscured by the mask that hid his face.

As Sirius Black took his place amongst the others he felt, for the first time, completely unremarkable. A small part of him railed against this, wasn't he supposed to feel somehow bigger? Wasn't he now complete? This was supposed to be the greatest day of his life, the beginning of the new day of the wizarding world, yet he felt hollow and empty and all he could think about were how different the thin hands that had held his wrist were to the ones that belonged to the green eyed boy. They had both left a mark on him but only one was supposed to matter.

…

A.N- Well, well, well… what will happen now? Were you shocked? Can anyone figure out what the hell the title means? Tune in next week, or more correctly, next chapter to find out!


	2. Chapter 2

Density

Chapter Two- A Death Eater Raid, a Rescue and an Ending (of sorts.)

Sirius had been sent on his first raid for the Dark Lord. He was to enter the home of Ignatius Morcombe, a Ministry worker and capture him. Ignatius was to be taken to the Dark Lord and returned to his home before daybreak. Voldemort had begun to use the Imperius curse to great effect and a worker in the Auror's office would be a handy contact. This was a high-risk, highly important assignment and Sirius was honoured to be given such a mission, but he had wondered when Voldemort had insisted on Sirius' little brother being included in the raiding party. Regulus was 16 and very excited to be there, he and his parents had seen it as a great honour yet Sirius couldn't shake the feeling that it was really a test of his fealty. Regardless, he would never disobey his master. Sirius, Regulus and the other four men had begun the raid easily and quietly, within minutes they had entered the house and bound and incapacitated the mark. Regulus seemed more alive than ever before, his eyes wide while he helped do his master's bidding. Sirius couldn't shake the idea that it had all been a little too simple.

He hated when he was right.

The small band had exited the back door of the house, only to find a team of ten from the Order of the Phoenix waiting for them. One of Sirius' own group seemed to lose his head, suddenly firing curses left and right with little care whether he hit friend or foe. The group scattered as the order members continued to advance. In the confusion Sirius lost sight of Regulus for a few seconds, the next time he saw his brother was when the boy fell to the ground, his mask slipping. A curse streaked across the air, headed straight for Regulus. Sirius looked on, helpless as the green bolt headed towards his baby brother; as the bolt was about to strike a figure appeared behind Regulus. The man wrapped two arms around the boy and spun away, his green eyes meeting Sirius' for a split second before he was gone. Sirius' glee at seeing his only brother escape the killing curse fired by the unwary dolt Carrow was quickly replaced by the sudden fear of where the man had taken him. Sirius signalled a retreat, the mission was lost, before he apparated away to an empty field. He ripped off his mask and robe as he reached for the mirror in his pocket.

"Reg! Reg, are you okay?"

"He's fine." A soft voice drawled as green eyes appeared on the surface before Sirius.

"What have you done with him?! Give him back to me."

"He's in no danger. He's at Hogwarts. We're at the gates waiting for Professor Flitwick to collect him. Perhaps next time you should remember that a battle is a poor place for a sodding picnic."

"It wasn't a sodding picnic… I would never… I had to bring him, the Dark Lord-"

"What a prick. You'd rather endanger your brother than disobey that fucking megalomaniac. You're lucky I was there, mudblood or not. I hope we don't meet again, I'd hate to have to teach you a bloody lesson." With that he was gone.

Sirius had never felt more conflicted in his entire life than he had in the past few weeks, and it seemed that everywhere he turned this Lupin bloke was there both in person and in his thoughts. They had been taught that there was no such thing as nobility in the animal, and this guy was a werewolf, the most diseased of all the creatures to walk the earth, yet he had been a good student, as far as Sirius could remember, and he had shown great bravery tonight, risking his life to save an enemy. All because he had seen that Reg was a child. Sirius couldn't help but wonder what Bella would have done in his place. For the second time in his life Sirius felt a tiny doubt eat away at his beliefs.

He felt the burning pull in the Dark Mark on his arm. Voldemort knew about the failure. As he pulled the mask over his face he wondered what Lupin's hands would feel like. If they were soft like his own, or callused from work. Sirius shrugged it off and pushed the thought deep down in his subconscious then he sighed and answered the beckoning burn.

…

Sirius' head had been bowed for an eternity, his shoulders were stiff and his back ached more than it ever had before. Voldemort had screamed and stormed, he had raged about the failures of the entire group.

The failures of everyone except for Sirius.

The pain in his spine was joined with a hot tingle of fear. He had been singled out by the Dark Lord for the second time, now he feared for his life. Finally Voldemort turned his attention to Sirius, laying a thin hand on the back of Sirius' neck.

"Only Sirius held his nerve. He held his nerve and thought about the mission. He called an end to the shambles."

Sirius knew better than to breathe a sigh of relief.

"But he knows, as you all should that one more failure will mean retribution. I expect super-human results from you, because we are the masters." The hand held tight onto Sirius' neck, the nails drawing blood.

"You're dismissed… except for you, dear Sirius."

The others left quickly and quietly, without a backward glance. The warmth of Sirius' own lifeforce trickled down his neck. Voldemort stood stock-still. Sirius followed suit, remaining with his head bowed.

"What happened?" Voldemort pulled Sirius into a standing position.

"My Lord, the raid was going according to plan. We had the mark and we were making our way back here when…" Sirius paused as Voldemort continued to circle him.

"Well?" He sounded impatient.

"They were already there, Lord."

"Already there?"

"Yes sire, a group of about ten from the Order of the Phoenix. Waiting." Sirius stopped again but when Voldemort didn't ask a question he continued.

"Before anyone could organise a proper attack Carrow seemed to lose his head, shooting curses indiscriminately."

"One almost hit your brother."

"He was lucky."

"How?"

"An order member saw his face, saw that he wasn't of age, and disapparated with him before the curse could strike."

"Who?" Sirius didn't want to tell Voldemort of Remus, he wanted Remus to stay tucked away in his head, but he knew withholding information could mean the death of him.

"The werewolf, Remus Lupin."

"He has confused you a little, this creature." Sirius tried not to let the fear show, but he was certain that his heartbeat could be heard miles away.

"Don't be ashamed, this is how they work." Voldemort seemed to laugh a little, like a loving uncle. "It's important for us to remember that they act like people, like wizards. They appeal to your sense of equality, and you can't help but pity them. You have these emotions, Sirius, of course you do. You are a pure blood man of substance and standing, it's natural that you should feel this pull on your conscience. Just remember one thing- this idea of equality is as unnatural as they are! You must put this idea away like all of the things of childhood. It must go the way of Father Christmas and the Easter Elf. I have many great plans for you, Master Black. Many great plans, indeed. But are you ready to meet your destiny? Are you ready for the lessons I will give you to help you become greater? Have you the strength, determination and conviction to stay the course?"

"Yes sire, I am equipped with all of the necessary vigour. Forgive my childish lapse. It won't happen again."

"Excellent." Voldemort's face split into a fatherly grin and Sirius wondered how he could ever have doubted this great man.

"It's time for you to learn the first lesson."

"I am ready."

"We can only be as good as our worst ally. If we cannot improve the quality of our friends they quickly become our foes. They become a cancer upon us and they must be cut off accordingly…"

…

The wind whipped at his cloak as he faced the heavens. He looked upon stars that had stayed the same for eons but, beneath them, he was forever changed. He had come to this desolate place to do the Dark Lord's bidding, he had carried out his terrible purpose never doubting the man who had sent him until he caught sight of the serene gibbous moon above him. He inevitably thought of Remus.

_I don't even know him. I've seen him a handful of times in my life and only spoken to him twice. Three times… Who's fucking counting?! I need to get him out of my head. He's a filthy animal, not to mention the fact that he's a bloody HE. The Dark Lord is right, he has somehow fooled me into these thoughts. It's my youth and inexperience and one day I'll grow out of it._

Yet when Sirius turned his eyes down to the quickly cooling body of Carrow at his feet he felt ashamed, worried what Remus would think, but knowing that he had done as his Lord commanded. _That should be enough, knowing that I have served him well._

When the sun rose in the morning he would be there to see it as he was yesterday but tomorrow would be vastly different.

He would look at it through the eyes of a murderer.


	3. Chapter 3

Density

Chapter Three- An Obsession, A Meeting and The Second Lesson.

Sirius' father had been expounding the good qualities of one potential marriage partner for the last twenty minutes and Sirius hadn't caught a word of it. His brow was furrowed and his mind elsewhere. He was nibbling on his lower lip when his father finally challenged his attentiveness.

"Sirius, have you heard a thing I've said?"

"No, I haven't, sorry."

"This is important, I know it's boring, but if you don't pay attention now you might find yourself with someone… well, someone like…" Arcturus tilted his head toward the closed door of his study.

"Mother?"

"Don't get me wrong, she's a fine woman from a good stock, her family's purity on a par with my own and as a young lady she had all of the grace, beauty and sophistication a man could ask for. She bore me two fine sons, suitable to carry my name and bloodline… but nowadays her voice makes me want to bite down on a dungbomb and hope that at the end of it they can't even salvage an eyeball."

Sirius had always loved his father's sense of humour. So few people knew about it because propriety dictated that his father should conduct himself with a dignified gravity at all times while in public. In private however he had a quick wit and his sense of the absurd was delightful.

"Sorry, my mind has been elsewhere. With my duties to the Dark Lord I can't help but wonder if a frivolous thing like marriage should be a priority." In reality the latest picture that he had been shown was a perfect candidate, a beautiful girl, from a wealthy, highly respected family. She was, without a doubt, exactly the woman Sirius needed to fulfil his familial duties but her piercing green eyes and sandy hair had sent a jolt through Sirius. He had trouble enough keeping the infernal beast Lupin from his thoughts, but with someone like her around the house… He shuddered to think.

"It's not the marriage that matters, it's the heirs that are born from it. The bloodline must be maintained. Your cousin couldn't understand that, that's why she no longer appears on the family tree. Her filthy half-blood offspring is a stain on us all. The match must be made, your family duties demand the birth of an heir and a spare."

"I will think about it and give it the proper consideration it deserves, may I be excused? I promised Reg I'd look over his Transfiguration homework before he hands it in on Tuesday he owled it this morning."

"When the time comes are you going to wear his dark mark for him? " Arcturus chuckled and shook his head. "Go on then, look after your brother."

"Wouldn't want to upset the spare." Sirius grinned cheekily, dodging the book that was hurled at him by his laughing father.

"Nice try, old man. You throw like a troll." Sirius shot over his shoulder as he reached the door.

"Don't talk about your mother like that."

…

Beside the parchment Reg had sent him sat an unmarked envelope. Sirius had hired a very discreet investigator and had waited some weeks for the information held within the envelopes nondescript exterior. He had enlisted the help of one Holmes Accord to find out some information about the man he couldn't push from his mind. He ignored the envelope as he read through the essay, his eyes sliding only occasionally away to gaze at the answers he craved yet feared. He wasn't sure why he wanted to know and he wasn't sure what he would do with the information, but he had it and it seemed to itch at him like an insect bite, stinging more as the seconds ticked by. By the time he was done proofreading Reg's essay and marking out the amendments he should make the need to see the inside of the envelope had exploded as a fire in his belly.

With slightly shaking hands he finally ripped the package open. Inside he saw a piece of parchment, he pulled it out slowly. The writing was in a copperplate hand, neat and efficient, just as he was assured the man would be.

_Subject- Remus John Lupin.  
The subject works in a small muggle bookshop in London 3 days a week and lives in a small flat above a launderette nearby. His membership in the Order of the Phoenix doesn't seem to take up much of his time. He has few visitors, merely a school friend named James Potter and his (by all accounts pregnant) wife Lily Potter. Lupin seems to have no immediate family and seems almost totally unremarkable._

Sirius held the envelope upside down and some photographs spilled into his lap. Small moments in Remus Lupin's life. Sirius gave a guilty glance over his shoulder before he began to look through them. This one showing Lupin selling a book to an old muggle woman, reaching high on the shelf to get it for her and handing it to her with a gentle smile, the next showing him carrying a large paper bag filled with groceries, waving to someone in the launderette before he ascended the stairs. One showed him beaming at a red-haired woman and patting her stomach with a careful excitement while the messy-haired, bespectacled James Potter looked on. Several pictures showing him living his life, each seemingly mundane, but as the pictures continued Sirius found himself putting himself in the frame, wondering what it would be like to walk beside the man, his own bag of groceries in one arm and Remus' hand in his own. It was a dangerous thought, he knew. The Dark Lord had already instructed him to forget this creature. But he couldn't. He had hoped it was a mere curiosity but it wasn't. He knew it had progressed far further than he would have liked, and these pictures, rather than sate his peculiar need to know about the werewolf merely served to make him want more, and more. He had never wanted for anything in his life and this simmering desire sat uncomfortably with him. He had no idea what to do about it. All he could do was promise that he wouldn't go near the sandy haired man.

Sirius was no stranger to deception, he had lied variously throughout his life, but this was the first time he had been caught lying to himself. He didn't even know what he was doing here, in a ruck of muggles, sitting in a café peering anxiously at a launderette down the road. He had been here every day this week and he knew, despite his own objections, that he would be here again tomorrow. He stared down at his cold tea and sighed. He swirled the dregs around the bottom of the cup before he turned it over on the saucer. He watched as the final drips fell into the dish and flipped it over, his slender fingers holding the cup gently, his eyes focused on the tea leaves. He stared, his brow furrowed as the signs seemed to make no sense. He was lost in trying to figure it out when a familiar yet foreign drawl met his ears.  
"I guess everyone's seeing strange things lately. You're here marvelling at blobs of spent tea, wondering what it all means and I'm living life and minding my own business when I see a death eater casually sipping tea in my local, and not just today, but every day this week. I'm sure you're puzzled, but it's nothing compared to my confusion. So, tell me, why the devil are you here?"  
Sirius didn't look up from the cup, he merely turned it on its side and, infinitely quietly, he said "I don't know."  
"What do you mean, you don't know? Surely you have some motive…"  
Sirius turned the cup again, his fingers gently rotating it to the right then back again. Remus looked down at him, totally lost. He didn't know if he should be amused or worried, angry, or ready for danger, but as he looked down at the man sitting before him he felt something unexpected- pity. He sighed as he turned to leave.  
"Would you like a cup of tea?" Sirius asked unexpectedly.  
"I'm sorry?"  
"Would you like to sit down and have a cup of tea?" Sirius finally looked up from his empty teacup. In reply Remus shook his head as though he thought Sirius was mad, but he still sat. Sirius beckoned the waiter and they ordered a fresh pot of tea. When he was gone the two men just stared silently at each other. Remus patiently waiting for Sirius to answer his earlier question.  
"I have no idea why I'm here. I think first, I should thank you for what you did for my brother, that was… a noble thing."  
"Anyone would have done that." Remus shrugged.  
"No, I don't think so."  
"Perhaps,' Remus glanced at Sirius' left arm, 'you run in the wrong circles."  
Sirius nodded slowly and looked away having no idea what to say next. They sat in further silence until long after the tea was delivered to their table. Sirius poured, his slender hands holding the teapot with quiet and innate nobility. He made silent enquiries about how Remus had his tea with a gesture here and a raised eyebrow there. They sat back and sipped quietly.  
"I've always thought that… that I knew things, that I had all the information… that the world was cut and dried, black and white, yes and no, right and wrong… us and them… but I've had these creeping, seeping slow doubts, they eat away at me and send me mad, like some Chinese water torture… I've never told anyone that. Can't tell anyone anything, never know what they'll say to the dark lord. And I have no idea why I'm telling you."  
He looked a little lost, and as Remus was about to talk to him about it he asked another question.  
"Do you like working in a bookshop?"  
"Yes. I do, actually. I think it's marvellous. I've always loved books… I spend a large proportion of my time injured, so it's been a great comfort to me."  
"You looked happy there, selling books to little old ladies and schoolchildren."  
"I am. I'm very contented."  
"What's that like?"  
"Selling books?"  
"No, contentment."  
"Surely you know."  
"I used to think I did,,, But lately I've questioned everything."  
"Why?"  
"Because someone I had always been taught was sub-human displayed more nobility and bravery than anyone I've ever met in my life. He's done it on more than one occasion and I find myself thinking about that… about him. There's been a shift in my worldview, and I fear I will fall off the earth and go spinning in to space. I have nothing to cling to."  
"Is that why you're here? To see me? To find out how I do it?"  
"Yes and no. I'm not here to find out how you do it, but I'm here to see you… Well, look at you might be the more correct way of putting it."  
Remus sat back and studied the man before him. The earnest features and the slightly reddened eyes made him unable to doubt the words he had said, but he didn't know what to do next. He was wary. Sirius had always been the enemy, but he was intrigued. I mean, he had eyes, so he could see that Sirius was very attractive, especially when he was so lost. He thought for a long time.  
"Come with me."  
Sirius rose and followed Remus to the counter where Remus paid.  
"I should pay for that. I asked you, remember."  
"Nonsense." Remus waved away his protests with a hand and set off down the street.  
"Where are we going?"  
"To the park. It's a nice day…"  
Sirius hadn't noticed, he couldn't remember when he'd ever taken notice of the weather, but as his eyes raised skyward he saw that the sky was clear and the sun was shining. They walked side-by-side and when they got to the park and found a park bench they sat side-by-side.  
"Tell me, what do you see?"  
Sirius looked out at the families playing.  
"Muggles."  
"What about them?"  
"What?"  
"What about them? What are they doing?"  
"I dunno, muggle stuff I guess."  
"Wrong." Remus smiled gently and looked over to a small boy, his chubby legs held him uncertainly as he took what could have been his first steps under the watchful eye of his mother, cheered on by the squealing encouragement of his older brother.  
"See? They are _living_. Just like us. I don't mean the day to day little differences. I don't mean they have electricity and we have magic, I mean living. See that older brother there? He's got dreams and fears and wonderful schemes. He's got years ahead of him. He'll get older at the same rate we do, he'll go through the desperate embarrassment of puberty. One day he might fall in love, maybe have his heart broken. Then he'll dust himself off and do it all over again. He'll grow and experience what we all experience then he'll help shepherd his brother through the trials and tribulations. Like you and your brother. It's merely an accident of birth that left the magic latent within him."  
Sirius sat and watched the families and he knew that Remus was right, but the feelings of helplessness within him grew. He had picked the wrong side, and he had no idea what could be done. Could he turn his back on his parents? On Reg? He sighed and made to leave.  
"Where are you going?"  
"It's too late. I'm on the wrong side, and I know that, but that's all I've ever known. It's all I ever will know."  
"It's a lie."  
"And I'll keep living it. I wish… I wish I had known, I wish I'd had the chance to find out. I wish that I could sit here on this bench with you forever, because I think I love you, even if I don't know you. I wish I could hear your honey voice and your gentle wisdom for the rest of my days, but this,' he pulled his shirtsleeve up to reveal the dark mark, 'isn't something I can remove. I cannot toss it aside. No matter how much I may want to. Thank you for the tea." He spun on his heel and apparated with a crack before Remus could say anything. In the distance the boy fell, startled by the noise, and his older brother tried to dry his tears. Remus looked on, almost understanding.

Sirius returned to his ancient family home and tried to appear the dutiful son, he did everything the dark lord bade him and he had even narrowed the choice of his future wife to between two (dark haired) women. He had never forgotten about the werewolf, and he didn't think he would. If it ever came down to it in battle, he was prepared to let Remus kill him, because he wouldn't be able to live with the alternative. He thought he had succeeded in acting normally until one dark night. The dark lord summoned him.  
"I have a second lesson to teach you, dear Sirius."  
"I await it eagerly, sire."  
"I know when one of my own is afflicted with a disease of either the mind, body or heart… and I know how to fix it." Voldemort waved a hand and Remus appeared, bound and bloodied.  
"We shall find out how this animal has bewitched you, so that it may never again happen to a fine young man like yourself."  
Sirius bowed his head and thanked Voldemort for his kind and wise guidance. Deep within, hidden even from the sight of Tom Riddle Sirius screamed a defiant roar, determined to rescue the man before him, and exact retribution.

Voldemort smiled a tyrants smile. Oblivious to suffering and totally self-assured. He had set up his own downfall, and wouldn't realise it until it was too late.


	4. Chapter 4

Density  
Chapter Four- A captive, a keeper and something unexpected.

Remus had been lying on the filthy stone floor in his own blood for nine hours. He had awoken once and tried to sit up, when that failed he tried to call out, when that too failed he slipped back into unconsciousness. When he awoke the second time he sensed someone else in the room.  
"Who's there?" He tried to keep the fear from his voice.  
"I'm so sorry." Sirius whispered, much closer than Remus thought he was.  
"Sirius?"  
"I didn't know they knew, I didn't know they'd do this." His whisper was urgent. He hissed healing and cleaning spells as Remus tried to sit up.  
"Why is it dark?"  
"It isn't, your eyes have swollen shut from the beating they gave you."  
"Where am I?"  
"You're in the cellar at my house, there are death eaters everywhere. The dark lord has commanded that I find out the secret to you, the secret of the stolen magic you're using against a pureblood wizard… Why I, uh… find you interesting."  
"Then what are they going to do to me?"  
Sirius stayed silent.  
"Sirius, what are they going to do to me then?"  
"I won't let that happen…"

There was a house full of people that Sirius hated. A house that he could not escape from, so he felt himself twist and distort inwardly, changing. He hated his parents with every inhalation of the stale air within this museum of atrocities. He had squashed it all deep down within himself, and he was relatively sure that everyone was convinced that his strange and shameful intoxication was over. Sirius hated everyone, except Reg. His little brother was still the only one he would drop everything for and despite his preoccupation with the worrying dramatics involving himself and a dark creature he had noticed something in Reg's demeanour change. Something miniscule, but it had caught Sirius' eye like a beacon.

"What's up Reg?"  
Regulus was staring out of his window, his suddenly mature frame leaning against the sumptuous curtains, his fingers absentmindedly fiddling with the glittering fringing.  
"Oh, nothing."  
"Nothing, huh?" Sirius raised an eyebrow before he checked the hall and closed the door. He figured that Regulus might want to talk about it in private. Regulus turned to face Sirius when he heard the smooth click.  
"You always could read me like an open book." He smirked at his older brother.  
"You should write smaller, next time." Sirius joked.  
"That was awful." Reg scowled, half at the awfulness of the joke, half at the laughter that spilled from his lips in spite of himself.  
"What's wrong?"  
"It's ridiculous."  
"I'd wager that it isn't. It certainly seems somewhat important to you."  
"I… I don't want to say it out loud. I'm scared." Their bloodline and their shared dislike for direct sunlight left the Black sons with alabaster skin, yet despite this, Reg paled as he admitted his fear.  
"Has someone hurt you, done something to upset you… I swear, if they've harmed a hair on your head-"  
"No, of course not!' Reg smiled quietly and amended, ' well, unless you count the liver, and the Greeks would." Sirius racked his brain trying to remember what Regulus was referencing.  
"I'm in love." His smile was sad and his voice a mere whisper. Sirius grinned wide and embraced his brother.  
"That's _fantastic_!"  
"No, it isn't she-" Sirius cut his brother off by raising a gentle hand.  
"Don't tell me anything more, don't think about anything more, just let yourself _feel_ it for a while. We can pick it apart and destroy it later, for now just…" Sirius slapped a fist against his own heart, because he didn't have the word to convey what he meant. His little brother smiled, letting him know that he understood.  
"Thanks, brother."

Remus and Sirius had spent a very small amount of time together, their meeting brief and frantic, Sirius hissing quiet niceties in between bellowed curses and insults, at least until Sirius hit upon the idea that they could communicate via writing. Through the cramped handwriting of his noble keeper Remus learned that Sirius had held hopes to be sorted into Gryffindor all those years ago, and he thought it was his disappointment, as well as the beliefs instilled in him since birth, that had led to their schoolyard rivalries. He learned that Sirius was a conflicted young man, and odious world-view, quickly crumbling as it was, there lay a quick-witted, deep-thinking, gentle soul. He had to admit that had he been in another time and place he might pursue this glittering thing, pull away at the layers and learn the man beneath, but his every thought was on survival.

Remus hadn't seen daylight for what felt like an eternity, but he knew that he had been held for eighteen days. The twinge of the impending moon grated at him, and he knew that it was three days off. His blood seemed to boil in his veins and his muscle and bone seemed to lengthen and contract in readiness for the transformation. He wouldn't consider his fate, no matter how hard his life had been, he wasn't about to welcome death with open arms. So he still feared when the ancient door to his makeshift cell creaked open, never knowing if it would be an unknown assailant who would leave after he'd had his fill of taunts and bloodletting or if it would be the strange Sirius Black, the man who seemed to love him without knowing him, the man who whispered quiet encouragement and gentle apologies amongst the dirt and depression.

It didn't matter who had come before, Remus hadn't expected the next visitor who came calling. The door creaked open and a hooded figure strode in, his mask removed to reveal Regulus Black.  
"Are you him? Really?"  
"I'm sorry, I don't know what you mean…"  
"Are you the one? The man who bewitched my brother and changed him so? But I forget, you're not a man are you? You're a beast."  
"I'm sorry?"  
Regulus merely crouched opposite Remus and studied him for the longest time, not blinking or speaking, just looking him over. Finally he sighed, and sat on the cold stones.  
"I think that my brother isn't so changed… That makes me wonder if that means that you haven't bewitched him…"  
Remus didn't dare reply, unsure of the young man before him, and not wishing to put anyone in danger, himself or Sirius. Regulus simply stared some more before he rose, replaced his silver mask and strode imperiously from the room.

"Have you been feeding that little pet of yours like a good boy, Black?" Severus sneered as cruel sniggers rose form the people around them.  
"My pet?"  
"Strange for a man of your blood to fall for a thing like that, sad eyes and skinny limbs."  
"Really? I would have thought that you would understand, Severus. But this must be some jealousy. I believe that the Dark Lord has forbidden you keeping your own ginger rat." Severus quaked with sheer rage at Sirius' words, but the heir continued, "Then again, I have learned the error of my ways, the thing in the dungeon is to be studied, to advance our cause. The creature in Godrick's Hollow still has you mooning over it, even when it carries the spawn of a blood traitor."  
Voldemort emerged from his place in the shadows and clapped a hand on Sirius' back.  
"Ah, Sirius, nice to see that you have found your way onto the good path once again. Perhaps though, you should be more understanding of those still fooled?"  
"My lord."  
"I was thinking that at the full moon, we might have a show! Perhaps we could watch the creature devour a muggle?" Voldemort revelled in the titillated applause that filled the room.  
"My lord, if I may, why give the beast the satisfaction? Let the animal hunt smaller creatures, keep it in it's place. Let us hunt for muggles. A raid will be much more satisfying than playing the mere spectator. Keep the thrill of the kill for us… Feed the animal the remains, the scraps if you will."  
"You are a credit to your kind, master Black!" Voldemort praised as the room erupted in excited applause.  
As the conversation turned to details of the prospective targets Sirius wondered how much more of this he could take.

"He's been gone for weeks! And with the moon tomorrow night, I'm becoming more and more convinced that he's been taken." James Potter looked pleadingly into the blue eyes that hadn't seemed to sparkle for months.  
"We are all very worried about Remus, but what more can I do? I understand that he's like a brother to you, but we've sent out search parties and there is no sign of him. Inaction is not what we are doing, mister Potter, but sometimes one must remain patient."  
James sprung from his chair, his nerves getting the best of him.  
"Knowing that you're right and wanting to agree with you are two completely different things…" He grabbed his coat and had disappeared into the floo network before Albus could reply.  
He arrived in his own fireplace swearing and muttering as he wiped the dust from his sleeves. The house was quiet, Lily had gone shopping with Alice Longbottom. He walked to the refrigerator that Lily insisted that they keep and extracted a beer, ignoring the judgemental tick the clock seemed to give (right before it struck eleven, just to drive home it's disapproval with morning drinkers.) He kicked his shoes off as he walked back to his study and flopped down in a soft armchair and took a giant swig before he noticed the other figure in the room.  
"Potter… Now, don't hex me…" Sirius began, not finishing the sentence because he was caught in a full body-bind curse.  
"What are you doing here? A death eater lurking in a man's house can set his teeth on edge."  
"I mean no harm… I came to talk about Remus."  
"What have you done to him?"  
"Nothing, if you check my back pocket you'll get some answers." James rolled Sirius over roughly before he pulled a hand mirror from his cloak.  
"What are you playing at?"  
"James." A familiar voice hissed.  
"Moony?"  
"Look at the mirror." James looked and was astounded to see Remus staring back at him.  
"Moony! Are you okay? Where are you?"  
"I'm being held by the death eaters… hey, where's Sirius, you didn't hurt him did you?"  
"Course not, he's on the floor."  
"What's he doing there?"  
"That's where one tends to end up when one is hit with a body-bind curse." Sirius answered from the floor.  
"Let him up, will you?"

The moon was mere hours away, and suddenly the air bloomed into a symphony, a riot of smells. Remus' rapidly devolving nose picked up hints and secrets that his human nose never could. He could smell the kitchens, the perspiration of the guard in the hall above. He could smell Sirius, somewhere far above him, outside an oncoming storm, but under the cacophony he smelled something else, something much more interesting and much more sinister than anything else. If he ever got out of this place alive he would take with him some very valuable information, but for now with his bones readying themselves the be savaged by the lunar forces all he could do was close his eyes and try in vain to sleep.

"I'm not feeling at all well, mother." Regulus croaked to his mother as they readied themselves for the full moon raid. She hissed at him through the door about making her look bad. "I think it's spattergroit." Her hiss seemed to come from somewhere further away than it had previously, he imagined her retreating up the hall, her handkerchief pulled up to her nose, a look of disgust crossing her features. She shrieked for the house elf and a few seconds later Kreacher appeared at his bedside. The elf looked over his master and returned to report to the mistress of the household. She left then without a goodbye, off to find Sirius. She would search high and low for him, because at that moment he was crouched beside his brother's door, smirking at his brother who looked absolutely fine.  
"She bought it."  
"Certainly did."  
"Are you sure about this, Reg?"  
"Yeah, I am."  
"Who are you doing this for?"  
"I'm doing it for myself. Not for you, not for her." The 'her' he referred to turned out to be a muggle-born ravenclaw that Regulus had been in love with since second year. He had told Sirius about her two weeks ago mere days after confessing that he was in love at all. Both brothers had outgrown the ridiculous ideals of their upbringing and were about to do something about it.

hope everyone's enjoying the story so far. Any suggestions or (dare I say it?) criticisms, drop me a review. :P


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five  
A raid and a rescue…

They came upon the house from the southeast, the wind carrying the smell of stale beer and staler morals. The house was a little away from the others, as though even here, amongst the debris of muggle society its inhabitants were somehow lesser. Voldemort smiled to himself. Sirius had picked the spot well. He had been concerned that the boy's change of heart was insincere, but as he delved into the depths of his mind and was awash with the young man's true tides he found an echoing revulsion and shame. He had seen the errors of his ways and had made true amends with this little expedition. Voldemort's smile crooked _'Pity I'm to live forever, the boy would have made a handsome successor.'  
_A voice inside the shack called out, the death eaters froze. They liked to watch first, to see the victims living… otherwise death had no glorious alternative and the fun was hollow.  
"Where are you, you old bitch?! I'll have another beer!"  
"Norman, don't you think…" A shriek filled the air as Norman's fist connected.  
"I _do _think, woman! I think and you fucking _do_! Now, shuffle into the kitchen and get me a goddamned beer. NOW!"  
Bella had smiled, her eyes lighting up in ecstasy when she heard the woman whimpering. Her eyes and cheeks had darkened and her bosom heaved.  
"Stop that whimpering. You're good for nothing but mewling. If you didn't have a pussy you'd be totally useless!"  
Finally Voldemort gave the signal, his eyes fixed on the house. He looked like a cat before it pounced, wound tight, muscles sleek and taught. Many in the party were still shocked by his presence. It was unusual for him to take part in raids. But they supposed everyone had to let their hair down every once in a while, metaphorical though it may be.  
****

Reg had been listening to it for the last hour. When the screams had become tortured howls he had crushed his hands against his head, the noise was deafening, but it was the thought of what was to come that had started to crush him, pressing upon his youth and almost making him turn away, just leave them all. Childish tears had welled up, unbidden from years ago, it seemed. But in the end he had risen from the corner of the study and had summoned Kreacher to do his bidding. The elf had listened quietly, as Regulus knew he would. If he felt any conflict between his task and his own feelings he didn't show it. Regulus wished that this, as with many other things, was different. But this maddening world was the only one he had, and he was changing what he could-for the better, he hoped.  
***

The man was a little older than they had expected, but his chest was still broad, his arms wide and his hands stained with the same blood that marred his wife's visage. They had been childhood sweethearts- not that anyone standing in the squalid, dimly lit lounge. The blue light of some cop drama or another flickered across his confused features.  
"What the f-"  
"ooh, this one has a potty mouth! See what animals they are, these muggles?" Voldemort held the man above in a full body-bind curse. He beckoned for his followers to crowd around, he had a lesson for them all. Lucius kicked the woman cowering by the armchair, her dress spattered with blood, now had a long trail of mucus on it, she had been silently crying in deep racking sobs. She was an old hand at violence- especially that directed at her, Sirius thought, _she knows to keep quiet_. Sirius was the only one who paid her the slightest attention. Which is why he was the only one in the room not surprised when a wand seemed to appear very suddenly in her right hand. Surely, the others would have noticed her rise and stun Voldemort had it not been for the entirety of the Order of the Phoenix appearing in every door and window, firing curses. Even the armchair was against them- Horace Slughorn had confunded Bellatrix while she still thought him furniture. Within minutes the death eaters had been neutralised and Sirius helped a cursing Norman to his feet. One of Norman's eyes swivelled about in his head. As the potion wore off his snarling visage was replaced with that of Mad-eye Moody's.  
"A room full of wizards and _no-one_ thought to cushion my fall!?"  
Norman's wife's blue eyes sparkled as she sprouted a long, impressive beard.  
"Sorry about that, Alastor. Bigger fish and all that…" Dumbledore's voice apologised as his features re-arranged themselves. Through it all, Sirius stood looking at his family and former friends at his feet. He had a surge half-way between elation and fear. _It's over_…_almost_.  
***

Regulus hoped that the potion would last long enough for him to survive this. He was relatively new to side-along apparition and, he imagined, would be the first wizard to ever try it with a sedated werewolf as his companion. Kreacher had played his part perfectly. He had given the werewolf the drugged meat and had exited the cell in short order. He had risked his life to ensure that the beast was indeed asleep, and now Reg had to say goodbye. Admittedly it would only be a short time before they saw each other again- for his parents were both surely in custody by now, yet Reg felt as though he were saying goodbye to everything. He took one final look around, noticing the decay behind the opulence for the very first time, before he spun on his heel.

James Potter waited, as patiently as his nature would allow, for the boy. He was beginning to despair when he heard the familiar crack and saw a dark-haired youth arrive with Moony.  
"He give you any trouble?" James asked, checking him quickly for injuries.  
"Not yet, but if you don't stop arsing about, he might give us both a bit more than we would like."  
James was about to retort when Moony started to shift in his sleep. He decided not to argue, Remus was safe for now, and they would be able to talk in the morning. He exited the mouldering room in which they stood and lead Reg out of the shrieking shack.  
"Congratulations, Regulus.' James extended a hand and Reg shook it, 'you're one of the good guys."  
Inwardly Reg groaned at the silly cliché, but he beamed all the same, swelling with a pride he never knew he had…

More to come soon!


End file.
